A few weeks ago we ventured to another bridal expo-type deal in Montclair. Ella had seen the ad the day of and on a whim… and much convincing from Ella… we went. Unexpectedly, we “won” a few things! One of which was $500 off at a semi-local bridal salon. I really hadn’t put much thought into dresses despite Ella’s best efforts to get me inspired.
The bridal salon called me a few days later to let me know of a trunk show they were having over the weekend and solicited an appointment date and time with me. Off we went to the bridal salon in the mall. I realized about the ten minutes before pulling into the parking lot that it was going to be a circus to get in the mall… being Sunday. I called Ella to check on our meeting plan and she was suggesting Starbucks. I realized the technicalities of getting around in the mall… how long it had been since I’ve even been in one. The walls of bodies that don’t care if they bump into you or stand in your way. I immediately wanted to turn around and call the whole thing off, but I pushed ahead and parked in the first spot I could.
There were people everywhere. The parking lot was madness. Do people do this every weekend!? I used to like this? I called Ella and tried to get out of walking through the mall to hit Starbucks, but she hadn’t quite arrived yet. Oh it was terrible trudging through the bodies only to arrive at the very long line at Starbucks. By the time El arrived, I still hadn’t put in our order. Just nuts, I tell you. We trekked back through the crowd and to the bridal salon.
We got the general welcome and the fill out this form. I tell you, everyone in the bridal industry wants your contact information. It’s really annoying. They asked our budget and what we were looking for. We said we were open on all counts since it was our first attempt. Ella told them she thought an A line dress would be the way to go. I said I wanted anything but the traditional white. The attendant showed us a few dresses and El dove into the racks. I, on the other hand, touched very little, and touched the dresses as if they were germ laden. It was everything I expected. Stuffy awkward room filled with puffy dresses. When El had fifteen or fifty dresses we moved on to the dressing room. Our assistant stopped us dead in our tracks and insists that El sit outside the dressing room. We laugh and say, no that’s ok, she does this for a living. We went back and forth on this and with a grumble she let us go. I guess they though we would steal a dress. Clearly, that would be easy to get away with.
We whipped through dresses like pros. I grumbled at all of them. This was not the place for me. I just knew it once we started putting the dresses on me. I knew this was essentially research for finding the right shape dress. Surprisingly, we found that the poofy dress shape was more my style. Our attendant seemed to be knocking every minute and trying to coax me to look in the ‘big mirror’ out in the salon. No thanks, we’re ok here. I don’t need to parade around the store.
El would send her off with three dresses and tell her nothing like this shape or more like this. She quizzed her at one point and said, “what shape is this dress? Is this an A line?” To which she quickly said… “oh no, that’s a princess cut.” “Are any of these A line?” “No, none of these.” eyebrow raise… “It was one of the ones you didn’t like on her.” Hmmm… ok.
The waves of horrible dresses kept coming and I kept jumping in and out of them. I started getting red and we laughed that I was getting a rash like Carrie Bradshaw from trying on dresses. We also realized that we should have been snapping pictures of the dresses so we could refer back. I whipped out the camera and we snapped a handful of the ones that had ‘something’ about them. None of them were right. And I was shocked at the prices for most of these dresses. I had already decided that I wanted to spend less on the dress then the shoes. Which is why a full length dress wasn’t in my plans. I needed a tea length dress to show of the shoes that should cost more then the dress. Not be hidden under it!
In less then two hours we had lord knows how many dresses on and off me. I wish we kept count, because I’m sure it was a record. There’s no way that the little attendant lady could have pushed that many dresses through. We did her job for her and she didn’t even produce one non traditional colored dress our way… or in her mind, any A line dresses. She was no expert. She wrote down the dress info and pressured us that one of the two dresses she wrote down would be discontinued at the end of the month. So we better make a decision right away. We said ok, we already snapped a picture of the dresses we liked. And oh man, her eyes got huge… “oh no, you aren’t supposed to take pictures!” Really, we didn’t do a friken bridal photoshoot?!
Thanks to the joy of Photoshop I was able to produce a few colored dresses. We also looked up the dresses online only to find out that both dresses are indeed A line dresses. Right in the description… A line. But we didn’t have any A line dresses. On top of it all, I realized that both dresses I tried on were so beyond beaten up. The one dress online had a gazillion little tulle flowers applied to the dress. I liked the one we tried on because it only had a few left at the bottom! The other dress I had said we’d need to modify a section of it, only to find my modification was actually how the dress was meant to be. Either way, both dresses would have needed to be shortened and dyed. Added to the already hefty price tag I wasn’t willing to pay even with my ‘prize’… I won’t be swayed to purchase something like a wedding dress just because I have a coupon.